Stars

Aries

The planet of love and romance, Venus, is moving through Cancer, so you won’t have a choice but to wear your heart on your sleeve (just be glad it’s not another body part, babes). Your heartfelt confessions might be a bit embarrassing, but your feelings are better out than in.

Passion Rating: ♥♥

Taurus

Jupiter and Venus are squaring off, so this week will be all about excess. Tears, tequila and tits out tantrums are the order of the day, so don’t be afraid to live life out loud. Embrace your desires and bugger anyone who tries to hold you back.

Passion Rating: ♥♥♥♥♥

 

Gemini

Venus in Cancer will be tempting you to live like a rich bitch, even if you are poor and want more. Pluto in Capricorn will be driving you to join forces with someone. Just don’t propose to a total stranger in the pub just because they bought you a cider.

Passion Rating: ♥♥♥

Cancer

This week Jupiter will bring out your generous side, whilst Venus is daring you to seduce someone by giving them more, more, more. Basically you might end the week naked, homeless and heartbroken after giving your entire life away to some plonker. Be careful.

Passion Rating: ♥♥♥♥♥

 

Virgo

Venus is halfway through your chart, so it’s time to be careful about the face you show to the world. Protect yourself from posting dodgy stuff on social media. No one needs to know which of your work colleagues looks like a corpse, let alone see that photo of you in your birthday suit.

Passion Rating:

Libra

Venus is meeting Jupiter this week, so you might make a risky move without considering the consequences. We’re not here to boss you about, but don’t do something bonkers like get a tattoo of Jessica Fletcher on your bum. Actually, that sounds amazing, but you get the idea.

Passion Rating: ♥♥♥

Scorpio

Venus is clashing with Pluto, so you’ll be struggling not to call out someone’s crappy behaviour. You’re the absolute diva of vile bitchiness when you need to be, but this week your words could backfire on your butt.

Passion Rating: ♥♥♥♥

Sagittarius

Are you bored to buggery? Is life so utterly tedious you’re not actually sure if you’re dead? If so, don’t worry because this week Cancer is arousing your erotic side, whilst Pluto in Capricorn means you’ll gladly trample over any hag to succeed. In other words: Sagi is back.

Passion Rating: ♥♥♥♥♥

Capricorn

Venus and Jupiter are squaring off in your chart which will create a potent car crash of desire, desperation and daredevil recklessness in you this week. Tell your family to prepare bail money, stock the house with hangover busting painkillers and get ready to roll.

Passion Rating: ♥♥♥♥

Aquarius

You are feeling feisty and finickity, so much so that nothing will be good enough and you don’t care who knows it. But don’t rip every poor fool to shreds. You need allies, and even your frenemies could surprise you with their kindness this week.

Passion Rating:

Pisces

Pluto is setting itself slap bang opposite Venus in your chart, so you’ll be tempted to start comparing yourself to others. There’s really no point. You’re a legend, pure and simple. Even if you can’t see that you’re perfect, listen to us when we say that you bloody well are. Almost.

Passion Rating: ♥♥

Leo

Uranus in Aries will be joining the Sun in Leo, so mountains that seemed impossible to climb will now seem tiny. Obviously this is metaphorical, seeing as you can barely manage a light jog let alone a mountain climb. Still, push forward and conquer whilst you can.

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Passion Rating: ♥♥♥

 

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