When it comes to getting horizontal, vertical or whatever position you might choose, who and what are you going to be wearing? Daniel Warner asks if we really do need to take our clothes off to have a good time or is dressing up and going down the way forward?
RuPaul once said that we are all born naked and the rest is drag and even for those of us who are not walking the runway in a cloak of feathers and a gown made of sequins, it is still kind of true.
How we dress and present ourselves in our day to day lives can be a whole world away from how we dress and behave in the bedroom. If you’re thinking you want to add a bit more excitement to your sex life then dressing up can be a relatively simple, inexpensive and fun thing to do.
Underwear, sports gear, jocks and socks or even a uniform might be just the thing you need to be putting on if you’re having trouble getting off.
Apparently, dressing well is a form of good manners but in the bedroom who’s really looking for a man with good manners? Saying ‘yes please’ politely and ‘no thank you’ kindly isn’t really going to work unless you’re into some kind of master and slave role-play or pretending that you’re paying for a pair of socks in a department store, and talking of socks, that’s a good place to start with this whole idea of dressing up for sex.
Underwear is the last thing we pull off and the first thing we put on whether we are about to do the business, have done the business or are just hanging around looking for business. Think about it, what underwear have you got on today? Did you even give it much thought when you got dressed? What if you met someone tonight and went home with them or got home this evening and the love of your life wanted to immediately pull your trousers down or your jeans off? You wouldn’t want to be caught unaware that you’re wearing really bad underwear, would you? Underwear can be sexy, and it should be. So maybe a new pair of tight, white pants, a pair of cotton boxers, some plain black socks or even a brand new jock could be just the thing that helps you go straight from boredom to fun times in the bedroom.
Now that I’ve mentioned jock straps that leads me neatly on to sportswear. There are so many fit rugby players that even just thinking about a guy in a rugby kit can be enough for us to drop our pants and throw our balls to the wind. Of course, there are a few hot footballers too so when it comes down to wearing a jock, a pair of socks and some sports shorts, dressing up as either can be relatively simple.
You might even have a favourite team so if you’re that committed to supporting them then why not buy the whole kit and start tackling a few new partners in your bedroom? It’s called a fantasy football league for a reason (although I’m not sure a straight football fan would agree with my reasons). Sportswear can be sexy and you don’t even have to be that fit to wear it. Football socks, athletic jocks and rugby shorts can be just the kick you need if you’re looking to score a lot more excitement in your sex life.
I can’t really think of a link between sportswear and uniforms so I’m just going to come right out and say that if you find policemen attractive then go straight out and get arrested. Actually, I take that right back, please don’t do that and if you do feel the need to impersonate a police officer, please only do it in the bedroom. When it comes to uniforms there are lots of alternatives to wearing the real thing. Security guards are an easy option to dress up as, just wear all black and scowl at everyone who tries to gain access to your bedroom door. Our emergency services do an amazing job but if you feel that your only emergency is an erection, then I suggest dressing up, using your imagination and indulging in some role play to quell the flames and put out the fire down below.
Lastly there is something I’ve only just discovered called CMNM. I didn’t even know there was a name or an acronym for it but it stands for Clothed Men Naked Men. This doesn’t take much explaining because it’s so simple and luckily, it’s also really hot.
The theme to CMNM is that one of you is clothed and one of you is completely naked, of course it’s up to you if you want to add more clothed or unclothed participants but let’s just start with two of you. The clothed guy can wear pretty much what he wants but the other guy only gets to wear his birthday suit. You can even change roles (and clothes) if you want to, and the rules are, there are no rules, except for one of you being absolutely buck naked.
CMNM can be interpreted however way you want to take it. One of you can wear a suit, a uniform, a track suit, sports kit or even a pair of jeans and a t-shirt but the other one must wear nothing at all, which brings us right back to the start of this article. Whoever you’re with and whatever you’re wearing, you don’t always have to take your clothes off to have a good time but if you really want to have better sex, sometimes it’s a great idea to go and get dressed up for it.